The email...

Ok, so this is the mail the boys received from their mother yesterday.

“Hi boys, how are you today? I would like you to ask Caribel Renee to please send me any pics she has of you, I am trying to start keeping better scrap book of the family. When she has time, thanks!

Are you learning anything in school? Did you make a lot of new friends?

I love you”

I am glad that she is attempting to write them more often, but do you really think that it is appropriate for her to ask for Babe and my memories to put in her “family” scrapbooks. It makes my feel a little violated. Sugar said it best “why doesn’t she pick us up and take her own pictures.”

She did see them last weekend, but I have a feeling that was more of her father’s idea, because he travels a lot and happened to be in town. Before that it had been since August 12^th. I just wish she would stop spending time and money on scrap booking and either pay some child support or come and see the boys.

My Pseudo In-laws

Fortunately, for many of you out there you only have one set of in-laws. I have two, my pseudo in-laws, Babe’s parents, and my SUPER pseudo in-laws the boys other grandparents.

This is difficult, Babe’s parents are ok they do not try and butt in much, except they want us to be married and mention it every time we see or talk to them. And Babe’s mom was like super woman, working and keeping the house spotless and a good cook to boot. It is a lot to live up to and I am no where close.

The mom’s mom, however, always makes me feel that nothing is good enough. We were late to one of the 2 baseball games that she attended and she said “if I were the coach I wouldn’t let them play, it’s not fair to the other kids” Geez Louise, it was t-ball. Maybe I am being unfair everyone should be able to take some criticisms and she does give good advice, but she was able to stay home with her daughters and didn’t have to rush home from work throw on uniforms and run out the door! Also, it is hard for me to take parenting criticisms from some one who raised the boys’ selfish brat of a mother (oops I have to stop that).

Is it too much to asked to be contacted a week in advance if they want to pick up the boys (their mother and grandparents are guilty of this)? We never get an email before Friday and we never get a call period for them to get them on one of the weekend days. Never overnight mind you neither their mother nor grandmother wants them for that long, their mother will do it but only when we ask and then beg, which isn’t often.

Wow! I went off on a tangent, well back to the 2 sets of in-laws thing. It is difficult; both sets seem to call me although that has been changing lately since I stopped answering the phone. I like chatting, but I always feel fake. You know even when I am having a bad day I don’t like to worry Babe’s mom and I just want the mommy’s mommy to think all is perfect and heavenly. I noticed that Babe does the same thing though. Well I hope that you never have to impress 2 sets of in-laws, it is exhausting. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone.

Yucky Words!!

So, Sugar was in major trouble at school today. He used “POTTY” language. There was this little girl and she might have said that he asked her to do something to him (the first thing to pop into your head is probably right). Well, I was shocked!! We let the s*** word slip sometimes, but he has never heard THAT out of his father’s (Babe) mouth or mine for that matter, but I lack the proper anatomy. He told us that all he said was pee pee and he can’t remember the context in which he said it. I believe him, simply because he has never said that word and actually never uses bad language (more than poop, pee pee, or fart).
The one thing he had against him is that his brother said the girl was telling the truth…when telling the teacher and the girl was around. I asked him exactly what his brother said and he told me he wasn’t sure, but that he did not say what the girl said. Little girls are already getting between them, huh. I’m really worried!!
For those of you that do not believe that this little girl would lie to get someone in trouble, all I have to say is that you do not know little girls very well!!

Oh yeah and after the Asst. Principal found out I was not the mother. She said, “I am uncomfortable talking to you about this, are you even in the paper work” in a snotty way. I said, “I’m sure I am. I did fill it out.” I know she had a right to be concerned and most of the time the Dad’s girlfriend is not the central female figure in children’s lives, but I still hate the fact that she would give their “REAL” mother more consideration. Then I realized I should have simply said I am his Pseudo Mom and that would have solved everything!

So she can play this game too.

The M-Word has a blog too. It is interesting to read and I feel like a cyber stalker but, oh well. It is interesting how things have changed.




Here is a post from June 24, 2004 (about 2 months after Babe and I started dating.  I changed the names to protect the childish, including me):


Well, things are good, Lil’Boy and I have been together about 5 months now, and he is so great! At first we fought a little, but lately we are always happy to see each other and he is super with the boys. Better dad than their biological father, he is an ass. He stopped paying me child support and I wont let him see the boys until he decides to pay me again. I truly hate their dad, I wish he would just jump in front of a bus. But hey what can you do? I got a new job, serving. I always go back to it. I guess I am meant to do it. Hopefully within the year I will be married. Cross your fingers for me!


[it's Caribel here] by the by, he only did not pay her once and it was because he changed jobs other than that he gave her 250 a week, worked 7 days a week and had the boys at least 3 nights a week! The child support was not court ordered he paid her because that is what she said she needed. Oh yeah and she has paid no support in the 2 years they have been with us.  Also, she was still married to Babe at the time, but yet she crossing her fingers that she will be married to the barely 18 boy who would have just graduated high school had he not dropped out.  She was 23 back then.




Now here is one from today, (oh how the tables have turned):


My boys. I have not been the best of mom's to them. I am going to make it up to them. They don't see me like they used to and it scares me. I probably made a big mistake by letting them go live with their dad. If I dont see them it doesn't hurt as bad b/c out of sight out of mind, right? Well, I have been looking at lots of pics [That I sent her] and stuff recently and now I am hurting. Sugar doesn't even like me, and he is 6 in October. I don't want him to like Caribel Renee more than he does me. Boys need their moms. I am so confused by my life and the paths I have chosen. They are a big part of why I dont want anymore kids. I would feel horrible doing that to them.




[I’s me again] We’ll see.  It was not a mistake for her to send the boys to their father, because he saw the at least 3 times overnight per week when the “lived” with her.  She shows up maybe once a month and she hasn’t had them overnight in a year!