Unemployed

I was laid off today…

It is very scary, I support a family of 4, and Babe’s uncle also lives here. Uncle D works, but not on a regular basis, so sometimes I support him too. I received a severance, but it is not much.

In this economy, being jobless is terrifying and I hope to find a job soon.

There are also repairs that I have to make to the house I am renting. There was some water damage and instead of calling the landlord Babe, decided to fix it himself and well, he tends to destroy all that he touches (but I love him anyway). Therefore, there goes some of the money before we can even think of moving into a cheaper place.

I have been hard up before, but not desperately so. All I’ve had to worry about is getting the boys things they want not feeding them.

He's gettin' unhitched!

I have been filling out Babes divorce papers, it is kind of annoying that nobody will help (not necessarily him, he’s never been a paperwork person), but the M-Word, keeps bugging me about whether they are done! 

“Ok now sweetheart I am doing this so you and Babe don’t have to hire a lawyer, so leave me alone!”

I’d like to make a lot of excuses as to why they are still married and there are some and they are good ones

1. Babe was afraid of losing the kids.
   
2. She wanted joint custody.
   
3. Nobody could afford the filing fee.
   
4. Nobody could afford a lawyer.
   

But in all reality, we’ve all just been lazy.  These issues could have been resolved, we could have scraped up the money, but it didn’t happen.

She hasn’t seen the kids since February 8^th and that was when I went to dinner with her and her mother.  So it wasn’t as if I got a break.  I just don’t get her!  At least she is signing off on Babe getting 100% residential custody.

My best friend thinks that it is hilarious that I am handling it.  Hey, someone had to do it.  I am not in a rush to get married, but I’d like to think I have a choice.

So I guess I am now a pseudo mom and a pseudo paralegal.

Friends are the best!

After probably reading way to much into my sister's negative invite to her New Years Eve shindig, the boys, Babe and I decided to go to a celebration thingy that a town close to us was putting on for free. We'll we got out 50 bucks (we were gonna party, screw the bills) went to Burger King and showed up at 8 with about 35 dollars.

2 candied apples and 2 beers later (about 9:30) we were broke (the candied apples were 6 dollars a piece!). Babe is not a big crowed person, so we decided to leave, but that of course devastated the boys, since we'd already told them about the fire works at midnight.

I hadn't really been checking my phone that day, but I happened to go through my emails and txts before we left and noticed that at 12:30 my friend flower child had written me and asked if I wanted to bring the boys over and spend the night (she has a 13 year old daughter and her friend with 2 kids more the boys age were there).

See she loves hanging out with the babies!

We went there and made it by 11 (YES!) I got to spend my night listening to the boys play video games and drinking beers with Babe and my good friend! It doesn't get better than that.

My resolutions:

Manage my finances better (needs and wants)

Lose 20 lbs (the right way)

Quit smoking (by March 1^st)

To be more polite to those I love, than complete strangers

Be more positive

Well, we’ll be drinking

I was trying to make plans for New Years Eve.  We'd had the boys for the last 3 years and although it is always fun to keep kids up past their bedtime and scream at midnight, so on and so forth, I emailed the M-Word to see if she could take a break from her busy schedule to take the boys.

She ignored it.

This in mind, I new that my sister would be having a get together, so I called her up.  I asked her if it would be kid friendly and she informed me that she would have to talk to Beer Delivery Guy (her wonderful fiancé).

When I talked to her again, I was told that Beer Delivery Guy felt that since there would be drinking it would not be a good idea.

This would not be a big deal, but that was the same reason he had for not letting the boys come to their house warming party.

My sister does not drink and Beer Delivery Guy is not an alcoholic, but he is a social drinker (the guy has a kegerator in the kitchen).  All get-togethers at their house involve drinking, which is fine.  None of the adults get belligerent, they don't start falling down, or any other thing children should be shielded from.

I guess I am just a little hurt, because I want the boys to have a relationship with my sister.  I always loved my hip young aunt (my sister is not hip, but really neither was my aunt).

I just know that my sister is like me the more the merrier no matter what their age; I am really trying to not be mad at Beer Delivery Guy.  He is a great person, but come on you are going to be their uncle soon!

P.S. I understand that I am being slightly unreasonable but I don't care!!!

I didn't mean everyone...just her

As I said in previous posts, I posted about the M-Words new assets on the forum Childlessstepmoms.org.

I got great replies. They all made me feel better and less bitter about the situation, but I guess my tongue was still a little jagged.

I gave one Childless Stepmom the impression that I was making fun of her for the boob job itself. This is not true, I believe that any woman can improve upon anything they see fit, and I may even partake someday.

My actual issue is with her priorities. At the time that she had this surgery, she’d been complaining about not being able to afford Christmas, that she was 2 months behind on her rent and that she really wants to get the divorce settled (which she has agreed that if we agree to everything in advance she will pay for).

I just do not think that spending or even having your parents spend that kind of money is very responsible. She has no sense of right and wrong when it comes to the boys. I just wish that she would put up or shut up! The shut up would be nice. I know the boys need to know that she cares, but if she’s not going to show them poo on her.

She actually said that she only wanted them on Christmas for a short period, because she would still be resting from her surgery (before we knew what it was). Well anyway, I have no issues with anyone who chooses to have breast implants and I do not believe that it makes a woman an airhead or bimbo. I just can’t believe her tactless timing!

Christmas Day

Children at Christmas time are so wonderful.  They smile all day, fight over toys, tell you this is the best Christmas ever 20 times, basically they make it all worth it!

They may cry or say the wrong thing when they open the present that is just not right, but even the rudest kids can make you smile on Christmas.

It is days like today that make me wonder what ny life would be like if it weren’t for Babe and the Babies coming into my life.

I had a great Christmas.  The boys ended up cleaning up; Babe and I couldn’t get them much, but they got great gifts from everyone else!

We got them a few things and then of course we had a Special Angel, that sent us a PSP (THE gift this Christmas), so Santa did a good job also!

They boys even got to see the M-Word, they got some great gifts from her loaded parents, as did she I hope.  I confirmed the bOObs today.  Hopefully, her parents paid for it, I would hate to think that her mind was really that shallow.  She complains about being two months behind on her rent and how she can’t afford any childsupport.

Well I am not letting her rain on my parade…she’s not the one that got 5 “I love you hugs” before bed!

It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas.

There are great people in this world!

I joined a forum specifically dedicated to childless stepmoms.

I added a topic about my situation with not being able to afford Christmas and the m-word getting a boob job (maybe?).  I wasn’t asking for anything, just writing out my thoughts, to see what others thought about my situation.

Well, I got a reply from another childless stepmom like me, offering me her PSP!!!!!!

All she wanted in return was to be updated on the boob job stuff.  So we could laugh and roll our eyes J.  I am so freaking astonished…there truly are great people in this wild selfish world!

I love this site and I love these women!  It was so great that I found women in similar situations as I am.  It is so great to know that others have to deal with the same crap that I do ( that sound sadistic); rephrase: 

I am just glad to have people that understand what I am going through.